Genre: metalcore.
Location: Minneapolis, MN-USA.
The history of metalcore is decades-old now. It started when the hardcore genre and the metal genre decided to breed-but being that the two were basically family members, what they produced was a genetically inferior sonic offspring. As this offspring grew, it got progressively weaker, to the point where radio stations even started playing it! I know-not metal at all, and even less hardcore. But just when you thought this auditory birth defect couldn’t be any easier for Darwin to pick off, along comes its most helpless stage of development yet-Odds Of An Afterthought.
Odds Of An Afterthought is a Minneapolis band-which automatically calls their mental faculties into question, because who with any kind of IQ whatsoever, chooses to endure one of those winters that Minnesota is all too well known for? But that question is overshadowed by an even bigger one-namely, who with any kind of I.Q. Whatsoever, chooses to endure being in a band this pathetically disowned by its parent genres and left in an orphanage to be picked on by all the other pathetic bastard genres?
This song has everything that makes a good metalcore song. It has angry toddler screams, sad toddler melodies, and sleepy toddler breakdowns. In addition, it has songwriting more generic than a bearded “alpha male’ douche-bro who fancies himself a stoic independent thinker, votes Republican, practices brazilian jiu-jitsu, and is part of a crypto/grind/hustle pyramid scheme.
The song comes in heavy like a dump truck, and then proceeds to take a literal dump all over the very idea of musicianship before leaving. And I assure you, it is going to feel like forever before it leaves. This song channels pure Karen energy at a level that could summon 5 district managers from out of thin air.
The production on this album is good, and boy are these guys ever gonna be bummed when they find out that it does absolutely nothing to mask their musical ineptitude. But then again, what could? A fucking funeral home director couldn’t make this mangled corpse of music look good, let alone even passable enough for an open casket.
But, I digress-just like whatever point this song was trying to make at the outset. because the deeper we go into the song, the less sense it makes. Hell, by the end of this song, I was so confused, I gender identified as a spotted Norwegian battle deer, pronouns deer/dear. I triggered a boomer and had to listen to a rambling monologue about George Soros and Bill Gates, and Benghazi. And you know what? That monologue was way easier to listen to than this ridiculous excuse for a song.
So this is apparently the evolution of metalcore. Upon learning this, I was so appalled that I denounced evolution and the entire discipline of science, and promptly joined the Taliban. Or maybe it was The Oath Keepers. Hell, I don’t know. All I know is when they said they wanted to burn books I asked if an Odds Of An Afterthought album counts as a book and they said sure, why not. And that’s the story of how music converted me into a religious fanatic!
In summation, ‘Curtain Call’ is a song that probably had a lot of potential, but must have fallen in with a bad crowd of genre mishmash rejects. Then, after seeing a D.A.R.E. Presentation, immediately took up a drug habit and became the sad mess we see today in a traffic intersection with a cardboard sign and a different dog every week. Just avoid eye contact, and maybe it won’t ask you for money.
This review is being published on Saturday, December 23-the same day as their Ugly Sweater Christmas show with Weekend Picnic and guests at Amsterdam Bar And Grill in St. Paul, MN. So, if you like ugly dudes in ugly sweaters making ugly attempts at musicianship, you know where to be tonight!
YouTube: @OOAAMusic
Facebook: @ oddsofanafterthoughtofficial
Instagram: @ oddsofanafterthoughtmn
Spotify: Odds Of An Afterthought
YouTube Music: Odds Of An Afterthought
Apple Music: Odds Of An Afterthought
iHeart Radio: Odds Of An Afterthought
Deezer:
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