GORELEM: You Spelled The Second Half of Your Name Wrong. It’s L-A-M-E, not L-E-M

Genre: Metal. Location: Berlin, Germany.

GoreLAME sent me this shit, and I’m just all over here like “Oh you poor things! I’m so sorry about your birth defect!”

Because that is exactly how this plays out…like a birth defect. It crawls really slowly around the house and just kind of drools on itself. Poor thing. What the fuck am I supposed to do with it? Euthanasia? I can’t, I just can’t. I don’t want death mad at me because I made him listen to this shit! I’m too young to die! I’m still a fucking virgin!

The birth defect tried to write music, but between its lack of motor skills and the crayons, it didn’t get very far. I called the nurse, but she miscarried the moment she saw it.

I tried throwing the birth defect a ball, but it couldn’t catch so the ball hit it and it made this awful braying sound and then I felt guilty, so I pet it on the head and said “there there”…and then I euthanized it.

Yeah I know it’s gonna piss death off but I really don’t give a fuck anymore. I just don’t have that much inhumanity in me! Plus, that shit was driving me NUTSO.


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Website: http://www.gorelem.de/

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Bandcamp: https://gorelem666.bandcamp.com/

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YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/GorelemMusic